Sunday, October 22, 2006

Fatherhood Programs--Nothing but Propaganda Tools Against Mothers

Many of these fatherhood programs are the impetus to millions of young mothers losing custody of their infants. A lot of these programs provide information to men inciting them with hatred against mothers and encouraging them to work the legal system in various ways in order to get custody of infants away from their mothers. Using all kinds of statistical lies about mothers, especially single mothers, they incite men into believing that children will be better off with fathers and instigate them filing for custody. 30% of the pool of custodial fathers is composed of these never-married, recreational sperm donors.

Even the abductions of babies is used as a tactic since these programs advise these never-married fathers of their so-called ‘rights’ which include in some states being able to race down to court and file for custody themselves if the mother hadn’t already done so herself. Since a good number of states consider a father, even if never married, to have Joint Custody with mother if she hasn’t gone down to court to file for legal custody. If they are not in such a state, the programs give the fathers legal advice on how to get a fathers rights attorney to help them wrestle custody of these infants away from their mothers.

I’ve spoken with and heard from numerous mothers who have lost custody of their children in this manner, many of them nursing infants, btw. Some of these mothers have not seen their babies again due to these abductions and these programs incite fathers to do this. Even sending your baby with the father or any of his relatives for a brief visit out of your home can end with a judicially-sanctioned abduction of your child.

One mother was telling me how she sent her week old nursing infant for a ‘visit’ with the father (claiming he wanted to take the child to his sister’s house) and she didn’t see the child for weeks afterward, the father simply disappeared with the baby. BTW, she went to the police, the FBI, that 1-800 Missing, etc., and no one would help her. As it turns out she lived in a state where both parents have joint custody immediately upon birth. So even though his name was not on the birth certificate, this scenario was not considered an abduction. Eventually her child was returned because this man had to return to active duty, he was on leave from Iraq. But quess what, that didn’t have to happen that way. She might have never seen that kid again if that sneaky dirtbag wasn’t afraid of being classified as AWOL.

I happen to believe that Christopher Rhodes (who murdered 7 year old Jerica) was probably also involved with one of these fatherhood programs, as many of these hate mongers against mothers are active in upstate New York. AND that’s what they are, in spite of the propaganda they hid behind, nothing but hate mongers. This aspect of the Rhodes murder case was never properly addressed in the media, so to this day we do not know the names of any of the people involved with inciting this man to fight for custody of a child that was not even his. Ultimately these monsters escaped detection and punishment due to the media neglecting to properly investigate this case.

These fatherhood programs should be immediately disbanned, the tax-payer money returned and investigations should be launched to see how many of the employees have been actively involved in stirring up hatred against mothers under the guise of helping men be better fathers. The whole thing is a racket to make money off of children, as well as a well oiled propaganda campaign against mothers.

Additionally in states where they are the most successfully with these establishment of paternity claims, the single mothers’ birthrate has dropped drastically, by 20% or more. Since single mothers are the engine of growth for the African American community, I believe a closer investigation will reveal that the black community’s population is actually the one falling in those states.

AND don’t think that’s not a lot of the motivation for these programs as well…

I have attached a link to an earlier post on my blog about this situation.

http://womenasmothers.blogspot.com/2005_08_01_womenasmothers_archive.html

Study Ties State Laws, Unwed Child Births

By REBECCA COOK, Associated Press Writer


Researchers at the University of Washington and Columbia University said Friday that child support laws' power to reduce single parenthood is an unintended consequence of a policy designed to help children and cut public welfare costs.

“Unintended” only the very gullible would believe this crap knowing the history of racism here. Another interesting read for those who haven’t noticed the link between these hate campaigns being waged against mothers and lower birth rates for certain segments of our population.

Anyway here is the article regarding a fatherhood program below. Don't be fooled by the language they use describing the program however.


http://www.dfw.com/mld/dfw/news/15775656.htm

StarTelegram.com

Posted on Mon, Oct. 16, 2006

Program helps teen boys adjust to fatherhood
By TRACI SHURLEY

STAR-TELEGRAM STAFF WRITER

ARLINGTON
— Becoming a father at 17 meant big changes for Oscar Perez.

Going to school was no longer about having fun with his friends. He would have to work hard to graduate from Bowie High School, get a job and help support his daughter.

Fortunately for Perez, he had support from his family, his girlfriend and an innovative program run by the Arlington school district’s Pregnancy Related Services office.

For the past five years, the office, which provides dropout prevention for teen parents and abstinence-education services for younger students, has been using a chunk of a yearly $320,000 federal grant to focus on teen dads.

The fatherhood program serves about 50 to 80 teenagers at a time, providing support groups and educational sessions at each of the district’s high school campuses and lots of other one-on-one contact. The teen fathers and fathers-to-be learn about parenting basics like changing diapers and feeding as well as how to register with the state child-support office or establish paternity.

Perez said just gathering with others who were going through similar experiences was a source of support.

“We would talk about what was going on in our lives,” he said. “Everybody tried to help out one another.”

The Pregnancy Related Services office gives support and parenting education to more than 500 adolescent mothers and pregnant teens each year through the work of five Pregnancy Education and Parenting counselors, a nurse and other staff. All the counselors have master’s degrees, and their attention to the students’ needs is intense.

“We’re keeping kids in school. That’s our ultimate goal,” said Tori Sisk, coordinator for Pregnancy Related Services. “If we have kids dropping out of schools, we don’t want it to be because of pregnancy-related issues.”

Though the program receives an average of $200,000 in funding from the state each year and some is available from the school district, the federal funds let it do more. The grant funds a salary for a sixth counselor assigned to the boys program.

It also supplements programs for teenage mothers and their children.

Funding for the original grant, from the federal Office of Population Affairs, ran out in July. But this month, officials were notified that Pregnancy Related Services will receive an additional $1.85 million over the next five years. Only nine such awards were made, and just one other dropout-prevention program for teen parents in Texas, Dallas’ Promise House, received a similar grant.

Because administrators are still learning the best way to track the fatherhood program’s success, anecdotes and the results of focus groups made up of teen dads are the strongest indicators of the program’s impact.

Keith McGee, the counselor assigned to the fatherhood program, said he usually contacts boys who are about to become fathers after one of the girls’ counselors or a teacher points them out. He talks to them about what pressures they’re facing and offers help.

Perez married the mother of his child less than a year after their daughter, Mariah, was born. Being parents hasn’t been easy on them, but both graduated and are buying a home in south Arlington. Oscar Perez works in Home Depot’s freight department and hopes to attend Tarrant Community College. Deven Perez, who works in a local school cafeteria, is pregnant with their second child.

“When we first found out she was pregnant [with Mariah] a lot of people were ” said Oscar Perez. “But we like, ‘You’ve just messed up your whole life,’ didn’t look at it like that. We look at it as we started a new life.”

Traci Shurley, 817-548-5494
tshurley@star-telegram.com

25 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great post. It is so important for women to get a clear-eyed, non-sentimental assessment of what the fatherhood programs are all about.

NYMOM said...

Exactly why I did it...as much propaganda is being put out and about regarding these programs when they are really nothing but a group of instigators inciting men to start custody wars with mothers...

BloggerNoggin said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
BloggerNoggin said...

ntmom said, "30% of the pool of custodial fathers is composed of these never-married, recreational sperm donors."

What about the % of single mothers that use their vagina for the recreational sperm donor?

I thought sex was a mutual act?

Wouldn't she be labeled as a recreation egg donor as well?

If women (like yourself) in this case label single fathers as 30% sperm donors then I think it's fair to say at least 30% (give or take) of single mothers donate their egg, therefore, leaving the mother in jeapordy of the possiblity of losing custody because it's a "free baby", call it as you will.

NYMOM said...

As usual your stupidity is amazing as there is no such thing as a 'free baby' unless a mother has died or had her rights terminated.

All mothers, whether married or single, go through the same process in order to attain motherhood. Never-married men, on the other hand do not. They contribute absolutely nothing to bringing a child into this world, and giving them rights makes a travesty of legal parenthood...

Actually since maternal grandmothers and biological fathers share the same amount of genetic material with children then a totally DNA construction of parenthood would give both never-married biological fathers and maternal grandmothers the exact same rights. Which should be lesser then a mother's rights. That's how it should be handled...

Mothers should be first amongst equals legally with maternal grandmothers and never-married biological fathers coming in second...ONLY a married father should have the same legal rights as a mother.

As women can play that DNA game too.

Anonymous said...

GIVE FATHERS THEIR DAMN RIGHTS AND SAVE MORE BABIES FROM BEING KILLED BY CRUEL, SELF-ABSORBED, CRAZY FVCKIN' WOMEN!!!!

Anonymous said...

Gee, except custodial fathers abuse at even higher rates than custodia mothers. All that crazy anger from people who can't spell, you know.

NYMOM said...

I believe the 'anonymous said' commenter is you blogger noggin...

So don't try to hide behind an anonymous handle.

Actually you are lucky woman are not all that self-absorbed, otherwise we would have been extinct centuries ago. Although when I see some mother has produced your ilk, I sometimes wonder if we might have been better off...

Anonymous said...

Hello NYMOM. I used to see your comments over at Trish Wilson's blog, so I glad to find you here. I think it is great to have a no holes barred advocate for mothers, it is a much needed service. I will be lurking every so often.

NYMOM said...

Thanks dlunch.

Earlier this year Trish's site kind of just closed down as she said she was focusing on other commitments these days.

Too bad as she was a good advocate for certain motherhood issues. There certainly aren't many.

As motherhood issues are very far down on even feminists' list of priorities.

Anonymous said...

Some feminist in other countries seem to take on these issues more and have some impact because of it. There are a few that wrote about it in the US like Fineman,(the Neutered mother).I think maybe arguements about essentialism occupied feminist discussion of motherhood for a long time. But there needs to be advocacy, and for someone to be there to make the point that whatever position they might have about those kinds of ideological arguments, real women are still having children and caring for them. Too bad that Trish is giving it up but maybe there will be others to take up the space she is leaving behind. Too bad about your horrible trolls,if the way they talk is an indication of their fathering ability that is truly frightening.

BloggerNoggin said...

Aye aye aye, I'm not angry Silver. I just feel in my heart that if I'm considered a recreational sperm donor then a woman that is single and wants have recreational sex as well the I think it's only fair that those women get the same fair treatment. If a man gets a recreational egg donor pregnant then I think he's also got the right to go for custody. BTW nymom, I don't post anon, if you waive your pointer over the blue link you will see it belongs to the eternalbachelor.

Anonymous said...

It's ridiculous to pretend that the situations are symetrical. Going through a pregnancy (having gone through a couple of problematic ones myself) is a lot more than being a recreational egg donor.

By basic biological facts the contributtions of males and females are by no means the same or even really comparable.

If it were anything but reproduction, comparing the two wouldn't even be considered. It would be like some drunk cornering you at a party and telling you some story. The story intrigues you. For three years, you work it into a novel between your two jobs. You take a couple of writing courses where you get encouragement. Finally, you start submitting to agents. On your 41st try, someone takes you on. On his/her 19th try, they find a publisher. You rewrite a couple of sections to please the publisher. Finally it's published. To the great astonishment and joy of your publisher and agent, your book is a hit. You get on Oprah. You start paying back the credit card bills you jacked up while writing your book. The drunk sees you on TV while at the Union Mission. He wants 50% of the money, because he "donated" the idea. Took 5 minutes of his time.

The guy would be laughed out of court.

But not if he got you pregnant.

BloggerNoggin said...

I like the analysis silver, somehow I believe that it should be just as much responsibility on the woman as the man when it comes to this subject. Why does the man have to be the donor, the responsible if she's prego, but the woman isn't?

NYMOM said...

You're right dlunch...I was on another site for a whole, Desicritics, which was an Indian website discussing feminism. AND they are just now starting down the path the west has already traveled with the whole gender neutral mothers and children business.

Hopefully they will learn from our mistakes. But only time can tell.

NYMOM said...

Well it might have been the Eternal Bachelor that time, but you have done it other times.

By the way, I never said or implied married men who have children were recreational sperm donors as you well know...it's a totally different issue with never-married fathers.

I should think that married men would not wish to support them...

NYMOM said...

Actually married men do themselves no favors when they support the rights of never-married recreational sperm donors. You eventually will wind up with less rights then you have now if you join their camp...

LESS RIGHTS.

Since joining up with their cause will mean every man will have to have a DNA test before he has any rights, whether he is married or not...and that could take months when every man has to do it...whereas right now a married man has rights immediately, right from the hospital...a never-married one must wait for a DNA test to come back in order to get rights.

So think about that...

Anonymous said...

I disagree. The rights to the bay should default to the alleged father, while the DNA tests are still pending. But, he should NOT be liable after that point if he turns out NOT to be the father. And since 10% of kids these days are of false paternity due to how utterly slutty women are - DNA paternity tests should all be MANDATORY for all deliveries! Waiting a few weeks in limbo is NOTHING compared to spending hundreds of thousands of dollars over decades cuckolding for a bastard baby that ain't even yours!

Anonymous said...

DNA tests for every childbirth...what a boondoggle this would be. Time to buy stock in medical testing companies. Watch the costs of medical care skyrocket. If you trust your woman so little all ready, maybe you should just head out now....

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
NYMOM said...

I just erased that comment as I warned you people I would not tolerate anymore vile language directed at either me or other posters.

Silverside is correct. It will turn out to be nothing but a boondoogle for the medical testing labs and will cause married men to have to wait MONTHS to get any legal rights to their children. Unlike what happens now where fathers who are married automatically get their rights at birth, same as mothers.

Also remember DNA tests take a few weeks NOW with only a small percentage of men doing it. But once it's mandated for every birth...look for the waiting period to triple...it will become like a driver's license...You'll wait for months to get it mailed to you and have no rights to your children until you get it...

Why should married men have to put up with this because never-married men are so irresponsible???? That's my question.

Anonymous said...

DNA tests take a few weeks NOW with only a small percentage of men doing it. But once it's mandated for every birth...look for the waiting period to triple..

Wrong. The market will expand to meet the demand. Duh.

Why are you so afraid of DNA testing, anyways? Afraid your kids might be exposed as bastards? If you got nothing to hide, what are you afraid of? Seems the only women against this are the ones who have been boning the pizza boy...

Anonymous said...

Who the hell wants "rights" (financial obligations) to a baby that ain't even theirs? Theose aren't rights, they're falsified liabilities.

That a lotta slvts won't be able to pin on false paternities anymore once they start DNA testing more...

NYMOM said...

I hardly think that a widespread problem in spite of the propaganda put out by men that it is. Actually it's already been debunked as being just another urban myth...and there is a post about just that issue further into my blog,

Men are just shooting themselves in the foot with this constant focus on DNA testing...as you are making it clearer to people that men only get rights to children through artificial, social-constructed, man-made laws, nothing natural, right or good about it...

Anonymous said...

Actually, DNA is the only thaing natural about fatherhood. The rest is all legal BS that doesn't PROVE or even CARE who the ACTUAL BIOLOGICAL daddy is!