tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post6419099176013099162..comments2023-07-28T07:44:40.802-04:00Comments on Women as Mothers: Another repeat post entitled: Nonsense from the Usual Suspects.NYMOMhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05762350054432716749noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-48964523068829031862008-04-27T10:12:00.000-04:002008-04-27T10:12:00.000-04:00Sorry I didn't respond but I didn't see this comme...Sorry I didn't respond but I didn't see this comment reflected in my emails. There's something slightly whacky about this google blog system, or maybe I'm not handling it correctly. Not sure.<BR/><BR/>But anyway: some public policy experts, at the time that the child support policies were enacted, saw the mean-spirited intent behind them. It was nothing but an attempt to shift the blame for the condition of Afr. Americans away from the 100 year post-emancipation denial of economic opportunities and foist it off onto the backs of their own families. <BR/><BR/>A more advanced form of blaming your mother or some other woman for everything men do wrong.<BR/><BR/>The changes were instituted under the Johnson Administration; but like many other public policy changes, the true impact didn't become apparent for a decade or two after the fact around the 80s/90s. The changes were made after a commission was put together to identify the 'causes' of the lack of advancement of Afr. Americans after the riots. <BR/><BR/>Anyway they came to the conclusion that the main problem was not a history of racism denying economic opportunity to black youth; but the fact that too many Afr. American men were abandoning their families and not providing enough economic support to their children.<BR/><BR/>The original intent behind child support was to reimburse the states for any assistance a poor woman needed to raise her kids. Initially it was just reimbursement for 'welfare' any actual money given to her. But now it's morphing into ANY assistance including state-supported child care in order for a mother to go to WORK...Eventually it will be for anything: medical, food stamps, housing and not to be able to pay it is considered criminal. Many many poor men are sent to jail and now, many poor women are starting to join them.<BR/><BR/>I actually used to correspond with a poor woman who lived in the south and hasn't been allowed to see her children in three years. She had lost custody to her ex-husband. Anyway she was under court-ordered house arrest, only able to go out to work and back (they had some kind of electronic bracket on her) and most of her paycheck was taken to pay child support. She was actually about to get evicted as she couldn't pay her rent on what she was left with...and many poor men are in the same situation as you know. <BR/><BR/>So this entire situation has gotten out of control, with even middle class families being dragged into it now (who never had a problem with collection of public benefits). Now the child support they pay is usually forcibly garnished through the state-run system that then uses those numbers to get reimbursed from the federal government for collecting child support monies. The federal government reimburses the state $1 for every $2 they collect or something of that nature. <BR/><BR/>So no one can address this issue properly to reform it, if we continue denying its ugly origins. Trying to compare this to some nut saying the government causes AIDS is not a valid argument. Why not try to address the actual child support issue instead of blowing it off.NYMOMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05762350054432716749noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-36751318297123306802008-04-10T11:28:00.000-04:002008-04-10T11:28:00.000-04:00"But that was the entire point when the idea of ch..."But that was the entire point when the idea of child support was first foisted off on the community after the riots in the 60s...a spiteful and mean-spirited attempt to destroy these people that has backfired and now haunts us all."<BR/><BR/>Wow! That's got to be the most far-fetched conspiracy theory I've ever heard. Right up there with the government creating AIDS to wipe out the black population.<BR/><BR/>Turning to child support was nothing more or less than an effort to keep the monetary demands of single mothers from swamping the economy.<BR/><BR/>A "spiteful and mean-spirited attempt to destroy these people" would have been more like simply eliminating the public benefits altogether. Turning to child support to defray the costs wasn't mean-spirited at all. It was very moderate and logical under the circumstances.<BR/><BR/>But if it also gets more of those guys to put a glove on it, hey, so much the better.<BR/><BR/>RichardAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-60164022687316630412008-04-10T07:20:00.000-04:002008-04-10T07:20:00.000-04:00I'm saying that stricter child support enforcement...I'm saying that stricter child support enforcement leads to more custody battles in our legal system which is currently infested with politically correct gender neutralized feminists. This has been going on since the late 80 early 90s...<BR/><BR/>I guess the word has now effectively spread, so there has been a dip of about 20% or so in the ratio of single mothers in those states with stricter child support enforcement.<BR/><BR/>I believe that this will also translate, if anyone cared to look, into a substantial dip in the population of African Americans in those states. Remember single mothers have been the engines of growth for that community. Let's face it if those woman had waited for a marriage to a husband with a good job in order to have any kids, their entire population would have been extinct about 50 years after the Civil War.<BR/><BR/>But that was the entire point when the idea of child support was first foisted off on the community after the riots in the 60s...a spiteful and mean-spirited attempt to destroy these people that has backfired and now haunts us all.NYMOMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05762350054432716749noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-39515798320764298252008-04-09T11:56:00.000-04:002008-04-09T11:56:00.000-04:00You're saying that child support enforcement leads...You're saying that child support enforcement leads to poor women losing their children?<BR/><BR/>Not following that. Unless maybe this is more of that BS about men suing for custody to avoid paying child support.<BR/><BR/>If so, not buying it. Poor women lose their kids all the fucking time and and least of all to the fathers. CPS takes them away all the time and puts them with fosters or with grandparents if they're willing. <BR/><BR/>They even have a nickname for CPS: "the baby-snatchers."<BR/><BR/>And poor women see kids all around them dead from drugs and crime, or carted off to juvie or jail.<BR/><BR/>None of it deters their reproduction one bit. <BR/><BR/>And Murray wasn't saying these gals have kids just to get the money. More like, they don't worry enough about having illegitimate kids because they know the benefits are there.<BR/><BR/>If child support enforcement changes anyone's behavior, ever think that maybe it motivates the guys to put on some of those free condoms that Planned Parenthood works so hard to get out?<BR/><BR/>Which is good for everybody.<BR/><BR/>RichardAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-21236969020348333862008-04-08T18:14:00.000-04:002008-04-08T18:14:00.000-04:00Yes Richard, my position is just the opposite of C...Yes Richard, my position is just the opposite of Charles Murray's then. <BR/><BR/>I say that as long as people are not coming to others looking for handouts, they can do what they want with their lives. Marry, not marry, father works mother is home, mother works father is home or both parents work and use a trained chimp to raise thier kids. <BR/><BR/>I'm okay with it.<BR/><BR/>As long as the children are happy, healthy and safe it's up to their parents how they order their lives.<BR/><BR/>But Murray was wrong in many ways. <BR/><BR/>One thing that has been demonstrated recently in a pretty thorough study is that in states with strict enforcement of child support single mother birthrates dipped over 20%. That's a pretty big drop and I guaranteed you that most of the dip is in the communities that Charles Murray CLAIMED were just having kids to get money.<BR/><BR/>So women, even poor, young, uneducated ones, will change their behaviors if they see that it will lead to losing their children. What woman is going to make such an investment in having children only to risk having them snatched away a few months later???? <BR/><BR/>So Murray underestimated the mother/child bond as men are often apt to do...NYMOMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05762350054432716749noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-43688212306598630332008-04-08T15:46:00.000-04:002008-04-08T15:46:00.000-04:00That was Charles Murray's position back in the '80...That was Charles Murray's position back in the '80s when he wrote the infamous Bell Curve.<BR/><BR/>Recognizing that it is mostly the dopes of our society doing unmarried births (still true, for the most part), he advocated keeping the rules real real simple.<BR/><BR/>No marriage, no rights, no goodies.<BR/><BR/>But he also favored cutting the other illegitimate daddy, the state, out of the deal as well. <BR/><BR/>By ending the public benefits that encourage births among the least suitable parents and making unwed birth the financial disaster it once was.<BR/><BR/>Which is probably stronger medicine than our system can swallow, so we'll continue to have the least fit producing more offspring for the more fit to support.<BR/><BR/>At least until the Muslims swallow up Western society and unwed motherhood ceases to be a statistically significant phenomenon, for obvious reasons. I hope I won't be around for that.<BR/><BR/>RichardAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-3464034997501635292008-04-07T16:07:00.000-04:002008-04-07T16:07:00.000-04:00I think I said many times that unmarried women sho...I think I said many times that unmarried women should NOT be able to take a man into court for child support, although I would let the state take an unmarried man or woman into court IF the resultant child became a public burden. <BR/><BR/>I also stated that unmarried men should NOT be able to take a woman into court for visitation or custody.<BR/><BR/>These are things people would have to negotiate between themselves as they did in the past. <BR/><BR/>The ONLY time the state should get involved is if abuse or neglect is involved. Or a child is placed on public benefits of one kind or another.NYMOMhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05762350054432716749noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8740475.post-28846371823451231852008-03-31T15:45:00.000-04:002008-03-31T15:45:00.000-04:00QuestionHello NYMOM.It would be very helpful to me...<B>Question</B><BR/><BR/>Hello NYMOM.<BR/><BR/>It would be very helpful to me if you could clarify your position on the so-called 'rights' or non-rights of men as fathers in this situation.<BR/><BR/>If men don't have "rights" as "sperm donors" unless contractually specified, and you agree with this, then do you think that "child support" for non-married people should be eliminated? Or is this a case of men not having rights but burdens by default? <BR/><BR/>In regards to this case, this isn't a simple "sperm donor" case but rather of a he-said/she-said issue. He says he wasn't a simple sperm donor and she disagrees. This isn't the same as anonymous sperm donors going to clinics looking to claim babies years later...PolishKnighthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16740194441387995674noreply@blogger.com